What Are You Afraid Of…Uhhh?

Most people are crippled by negative possibilitites.  They question themselves with “What if’s”, which prevent them from doing things in their lives that they would truly enjoy, or that they dream of doing. I have got to admit that I used to be one of those people.  I don’t know why but for years after I stopped singing with my sisters in the music group Nik-Tash’tA, I had developed this terrible stage fright.  I think it stemmed from doing a couple of just really bad shows.  We had been exhausted.  I was in school full time, and so were my sisters.  We hadn’t really practiced that well.  I think that also, with one of the performances, I had totally syked myself out because it was one of those “comedy and R&B” shows.  So I created this FEAR inside me of what if’s”.  What if I totally choke and then the comedians make fun of us all night?  Man it was a self fulfilling prophecy.  Our rehearsal before the show was great but during the show my throat felt like I had eaten a box of salteens.  It was totally not me and absolutely aweful.  I heard a guy in the audience who was at the rehearsal say…”what in the world happened…they were great in the rehearsal.”

So years afterwards, I have had to face my fears to really live the life that I truly want to live.  I am a singer down deep in my soul. 

I began to think about this topic last week, but really got deep into this conversation of “fear” running your life, with my best friend.  She was dealing with the same issue, and was finally recognizing it for what it was and what many people have learned that fear stands for…False Evidence Appearing Real.  You have to face some of your fears head on, and to do so, you have to see the positive possibilies insted of the negative what if’s.  I’ve learned that time is going pass with or without me doing things that I really love so I might as well do them, while still be reasonable and ethical.  I’m not saying do something that will harm or injure yourself or someone else, but to move you to action with things in your life that will make your dreams come true or move you to happiness.  What are some of these things for you?

Oh My God…Scary Spice Has My Body!

OMG! Scary Spice (Mel B) has the body I want to have even after having a baby.  Have you seen her.? She has, like, 12 pack abs.  I had to insert a picture just for reference.  Someone was telling me that she does 1000 crunches every other day.  I have to start doing some core workouts ’cause my back is killing from lifting my baby girl all the time. 

I am on a mission to get in shape as part of my 90 day Challenge.  I have been doing really well with the nutrition aspect and am now kicking up the exercise.  Today I ran about a mile and a half before getting ready to attack my work for the day.  It felt great, but I felt really heavy while doing it.  I haven’t really run, which is my favorite exercise, in about 3 weeks.  The second week of my vacation I totally fell off of doing any workouts, and the first week back at work I totally didn’t work out at all.  I walked a couple of miles this weekend, and that felt great BUT its not enough.  I want to make a major change. 

I’ll keep you posted on my Scary Spice transition as the 90 days go along.  Wish me luck and a lot of will power because I love chocolate chip cookies…lol.   Nichole Ayanna signing off!

What Are the Specifics

I really believe that by putting my goals out there for the world to see will put me under the pressure and keep me accountable enough to actually accomplish these goals.  It’s definitely something I think is scary to do, BUT I think it will keep me in check because I don’t like to give excuses as to why I didn’t accomplish something.  So before I write down my goals for the 90 Day Challenge, I have to truly analyze what I can give myself to do without overwhelming myself.  I’ve to balance and be realistic.  So here is a list so far…

I want to get out at least one email newsletter a week, so that my friends,family and fans (which can all be one person:)) can be kept up to date on the new things that are going on in my life as well as when they can see a new performance or get my latest release.  I need to hire a babysitter just to assist me a couple of days a week so that I can practically have another set of eyes and hands watching the baby.  I can set aside some time to practice more, get some performance footage, get my email newsletter out and get some much needed couple time with my hubby.  I want to maintain a good work out regimen.  I have been running  a few miles at a time with 4-5 mile runs on Saturday mornings at the beach…BUT haven’t been for the past couple of weeks.  I’ve gotta get back on it because I need to lose the last bit of baby weight that I gained when I was pregnant.  I want to step my workouts up a notch and probably go to the gym a couple of times a week during lunch. I want to find and buy a house, too.  Ok…weremy goals a little too ambitious; 1 email newsletter a week, hiring a babysitter, practicing and tapig performances, date nights with hubby, regular workouts and, buying a house.    I think it is all doable, especially if I follow my own advise I’ve written about in previous blogs about scheduling mytime as a Singer/Mommy/Wife /Motivator. 

I’ll keep you all updated as to where I am and what has been accomplished.  Let me know what your goals are and we can keep eachother accountable.  Good luck.  Peace and soul grease, Nichole Ayanna

Almost Fell Off and It’s Only Day 3

I am having a time trying juggle everything.  I just was able to unpack from vacation that I got back from last Sunday.  This is the not so glamorous part of my life, washing clothes, cooking  for lunch and taking care of the business end of show business…uuugggghhhh! BUT someone has to do it.  All of my little bichon doggies are in the house because it’s more than 100 degrees outside so let’s add it up. Let’s see here…uuummmm, baby, dogs, work, cooking, cleaning, music…craziness!!!!  I’m just keeping real, being a mommy, business woman, and singer and much more.

I’ll get back to posting more later…my friend just showed up to the rescue.

I Don’t Know Where To Begin

My mind is going a million miles a minute with all of the things that I would like to accomplish today.   I want to be able to get that video done of me practicing one of my favorite songs in the car…it may be easier to tape it after I get home;-).  I’ve been singing a song that my Dad wrote for me years ago called Where were You.  It’s definitely a challenging song to sing.  It really works the range of my vocal ability but definitely can get my vocals in shape with a consistent practice of it.  It’s a jazzy R&B, love ballad, similar to the songs in the likes of Anita Baker ( another great black female singer i haven’t mentioned in the past).  My dad wrote it when I was recording at the age of 16 years old.  There were live musicians in the studio…a baby grand piano, live drums, and even an upright base.  My voice, even at 16 was thick, low, and strong.  I re-sang that song again when my sisters and I recorded our self titled debut full lengthed CD, Nik-Tash’Ta.  I think it’s track # 6.  Check it out at www.cdbaby.com/niktashta .

I also want to be able to get a run in, put a wireless router on my computer, get into my email newsletter system and work on some stuff, and upload some pictures into my, Nichole Ayanna website here, BUT, I would be spreading myself too thin.   Doing all those things would be a little…ambitious.  We’ll see what thinga I was able to accomplish by the end of the day and I’ll update you on it tomorrow.  Hopefully, you are able to that video in the next few days or so.  Oh yeah, happy day 3 of the 90 day challenge.  How are you doing on the challenge, if you are doing it with me?